SELF-LOVE

The Following Article was written by Brother Tracy Gibson some several months ago and is revisited here on December 11th, 2012 {Tuesday} for youR enjoyment, information, healing and consideration..... .


The Power of Being Black...... And Loving It.....





By Brother Tracy Gibson

Not enough of us, as Black People, really enjoy or understand the power and glee of being Black and really relishing in that fact. The fact of Blackness that cannot be changed... Not enough of us understand that politically, one of the best things in this world to be is a Black Person, and specifically and especially, a Black American at this present particular time in History........

Why do I say this? It has to do with moral and ethical leverage. We are a people who have historically suffered, but overcome. Who knew, for example, that when the Reverend Doctor Martin Luther King Jr. was killed on April 4th in 1968 that he would become an international--if not an intergalactic moral and ethical star--a compass from which other moral and ethical leaders the world over would be compared to and that King would be appreciated and studied by school children all over the world. April 4th, 1968 was a sad day and at the time it looked as if we would never survive the day and get past the riots and the pain of such a loss--Let alone flourish and become some of the most imitated people {artistically and for our political planning, training, tactics and techniques} people on the planet. You might think that other people, especially some White People, really hate us, and some of them do. The haters are a very small minority. Most Whites just don't understand us and will never see the importance of understanding... {Not even with a Black President in the White House right now at the end of 2012 and on until the beginning of 2017....} But some of them, the White People, have tried for generations to do away with us through starvation, unemployment, lack of economic opportunities for our small and moderate sized businesses and by putting us on the front lines of their wars--or even actual using extermination through forced sterilization of our women. {There is even the Tuskegee study that killed several of our Black men through disease experimentation with STD's}.. This is history, I'm not making this stuff up. Yet we have survived and flourished as a people and our numbers have remained steady. {Certainly our quality of life has recently suffered with the economic down turn and the loss of jobs and economic clout, but there is always hope on the horizon.} Much of our strength has come from Doctor King who has taught us, along with hundreds and thousands of other community leaders and activists, Elijah Muhammad, Kwame TuRe, Angela Davis included, other teachers, civic and community leaders, just plane parents, pastors, doctors, writers, historians, visionaries and others in our community who have dedicated themselves to the community and our children and our children's futures these people have given us strength... Our strength and resilience has also come from our sheer ability to read and teach ourselves and each other about the problems we face and the truth about our history and the sheer insidiousness of the system we work and live under.

I say we have leverage because we are able to take our place as we exist in the world today--including our significant historic place in history--and pry open the minds of other people--Latin People, Asian People, curious White People, Muslims, Arabs, Jewish People and even Gay, Lesbian, Transgendered etc. People and others, and allow them to understand what importance our existence plays on the World Stage. {As I have said, several of these groups have mimicked our political tactics and strategies for their own benefit and we have to and need to start looking at this as a good thing and not be envious of other groups' gains, but look at their struggles as also moving humanity forward constantly and consistently. I say this especially about the current advantages that the Gay and Lesbian and or Same Gender Loving community have made [with marriage equality and Don't Ask Don't Tell in the Military] as well and especially them at this time}... Still, we have ethical leverage that many other people don't have or that other groups have not been able to pry free from the general public which has, until recently, remained steadfast in their rather Conservative and established political beliefs and their opposition to us.... {I say we have leverage because of how we have suffered and how we continue to be victimized even through Affirmative Action and jobs programs and other things that often don't work because we have been left out of the planning stages of these projects...} Our past and present suffering gives Way to us holding the keys to this leverage. But I don't, as our Pastor has said, I don't want us to be seen as victims. We have to surpass victim hood and see ourselves as heroes, champions and the leaders of tomorrow. It also has to do with self- love, self- respect and our constant and consistent desire to want to see ourselves move forward as a people. Block the hatred, and the negativity and move forward. BUT SELF LOVE is KEY!!!

What I really wanted to briefly discuss today is Black LOVE and how we gain so much from loving ourselves and our people. When we are proud of another Black person's achievements we have a real gift right there in our lap... When we are jealous we have something deep inside that needs to be dealt with..... Chills go up and down my spine as I write this because this is such a powerful thing that is right under our noses, and many of us understand the depth and magnitude of what I'm describing here. There is so much power, importance and fortitude in Black LOVE--of one's self and one's people. It is a secret weapon that allows us to experience a beautiful colorful prism through which life is seen anew, discovered a new and lived with new meaning, depth and girth. Being in LOVE with your people, and I mean just about ALL Black people, is a gift that you can really only give yourself if you were either raised with LOVE in your household, or have read enough and healed and appreciate Black people through your own personal expectations and your own personal colorful prism. Like me, you may have been filled with so much self-hatred, anger and self-pity that you experienced a series of emotional upsets and setbacks that required therapy over an extended period. Even so, the healing, once it comes, flows like the mighty NILE river UP to Egypt and has lasting and greatly positive benefits. This is largely how I came upon feeling this love for my people and myself and truly loving myself and ``WE.'' This LOVE has helped me achieve my own potential as an individual Black person, and has helped many of our other Brothers and Sisters achieve their own great and massive potentials as Well.









So, helping build self- LOVE, a LOVE for our people and respect for other Black people and LOVE for our achievements, is a gift you can give your children and grandchildren and is a gift that Will last and you and your family will reap a bountiful harvest from that gift for generations to come. Sometimes this ``gift'' comes in wolf's clothing. I have a friend, His name is Bruce, He lives in a rather squalid situation. He is a hoarder and He needs a lot of work done to His home. Bruce has helped me through many difficult times and is a LOVER of Black people, but He won't and can't seem to prioritize His own healing and get that house together. This is a mental illness. It is nothing to be ashamed of. I myself have had to struggle with mental illness--depression and bipolar ism. Bruce requires serious intervention before He will get himself able to extricate himself from his present circumstance. Most people let Him go and feel this is His business. He is a grown man, let Him be. I tried that for 10 years, but there has been no change. I did something drastic a few weeks or about a month ago. I took some shirts away from Him--away from His House--and put them in the cleaners. I told Bruce I would not give them back until he changed his circumstance. He was very angry and frustrated with me, even though He has now forgiven me. He might NOT be so forgiving soon, because I refuse to let Him drown with the Titanic Down at the Franklin Institute this month and early next year. Because, unfortunately for Him, {Bruce} I am not done yet. I can be a stubborn little fucker when I want to be. He loaned me $40.00 which I was suppose to get His shirts out of the Dry Cleaners with. I'm using the money for other things. I needed food because I only get $1,162.00 a month in disability and that is about enough to starve on. I won't have any money until next year {2013}... I decided 2013 will be something different for me. I'm NOT allowing myself to stay suck in the muck and mire of self pity, victimization, dis pare and anger. I'm pulling Myself UP. People tell me I must leave people like Bruce behind. But what do I do about all the LOVE I have for Him and how He has helped me for over ten years? What do I do about how He has Himself tried so hard to help Himself? This extrication and pulling up must be a mighty thing for me. Most people leave others behind, but I don't see how to do that. To the untrained naked eye I am just harassing Bruce, embarrassing Him and NOT acting in a LOVING way AT ALL.. People who think this are foolish, uneducated in the Ways of humanity and unknowing.... Sometimes the medicine of healing has a bitter taste. And sometimes you end up hurting yourself AND the other person by trying to lift up something that isn't ready to move. But Bruce is 60 years old. READY is here. The ``Other'' in me--the ``Other Black'' the man who has been cold and hungry and left out Himself knows I can't leave Bruce there in that situation. Should I call the authorities? Should I call my Pastor at church? I have to decide these issues and things in the next few days.









I hope you will understand the importance of this short article and how deep the feelings of real, authentic caring and LOVE are. It is NOT easy for some people to say they LOVE someone, because they were not brought up that Way. This article, writing it, has been a healing process in itself. I have been deeply hurt by another Black person {I have healed from it and learned with the vital help of a therapist over an extended period, as I have said. I never thought I would have gotten so many benefits that have kept on coming. You might need to do some healing yourself. You may have been or come up against a parent, an intimate partner, a stranger, a friend, another relative, an uncle, aunt, step-parent or grandparent or a Brother or Sister who hurt, mistreated or abused you, or you might have abused others. To really experience life to the fullest you must heal from that pain you felt or even the pain you caused others. The person who abused you MUST be forgiven for you to move on. It doesn't matter if the person who abused you is alive or dead. You have to find the healing POWER and forgive and move on... Otherwise you will find it hard to re-direct your life and move your life in the direction you want it to move into. You will find yourself addicted to food, drugs, sex, alcohol, or something else and your pain will come. It will come out in another way. The gift of mental and emotional healing is a great one and more of us as Black people need to understand this gift and help heal other Black people on a very deep level. My sister says that if Black people only got mental help and therapy for REPARATIONS it would do us all as a people a world of good. I agree. That is why I am intervening with Bruce and that is WHY people are calling me crazy. You see, you have adjusted to madness and craziness and so has Bruce. I have taken 35 years and healed. You probably haven't. That is why you can go into places that are called ``The Devil's Den'' and have coffee and sandwich and think nothing of it; that is why you can go Down Town in Philadelphia and spend $1,000.00 at Macy's Department Store and think nothing of it when there are no Black departments stores and WE as Blacks people continue to be relegated to being a ``consumer class'' of people; that is why you watch the news about a football player murdering his girlfriend and Himself in from of Football Executives and you go on eating your Captain Crunch cereal [because you have been inoculated against the truth having any impact on you the way it should for humans]; that is why you go on with the deep pain you feel inside and feel self-destructive and hateful towards yourself and refuse to get help and call it ``fear of the stigma of mental health healing'' and walk on with your pain in tact like a rusted iron butt plug up you ass.... Somehow you find pride and sanity as you watch ``The Simpson's'', on The FOX Network and think how nice it is that that little funny ``progressive'' cartoon has been on FOX [a Conservative network] for 20 years and that is just lovely. But I am here to question your sanity because I have already had my head examined and I am here to tell you about yourself, Greg, and IDA and Dena and Phil and Minister BJ.....and WADE and Terry [Love joy]--you for one Love joy are too fixed in comfort as are a few others at church.... You don't tussle any feathers and you don't want yours tussled, even though you told me you wanted to move from New Jersey, but you refuse to do so because you said yourself, you are ``comfortable'' ... Are you sane or have you adjusted to insanity?









When you have started on the Healing Path, you will find refuge and LOVE with other Black people who have also healed. When you have started on this Healing Path, you will find yourself able to talk more frankly and honestly with other Black people and tell them how you really feel and how glad you are that there is a GOD and a Jesus and that He has his hands over your life in a good Way. You will not mask your feelings, with too much marijuana or drink or blow or alcohol or cocaine--you will be able to have more open and honest relationships with your family members, LOVED ones and that someone special will appear or reappear in your life and you will be able to have that long term healthy relationship that you always wanted, but could never figure out why you could never achieve this and had to be alone for decades....

If you have NOT seen ``Flight'' with Denzel Washington I strongly suggest and recommend you go see it. It is about an airline pilot who is so cool He thinks He can ignore a cocaine and alcohol habit. But reality catches up with Him. This film is, like just about ALL of Denzel's films, it is well-acted, finely directed and sticks to your soul and memory like a good chicken and greens and apple pie dinner sticks to your ribs. Don't miss this film. It is a wake- up call. It will help guide you down a path of leadership and healing and better mental health. If you pay attention and don't continue to medicate yourself with food, medicine, alcohol, blow, cocaine, sex, hate, resentment and silly TV.

You, if you heal, you will have that better, more stable, healthier relationship as you heal. I don't care if you are 16 or 66, you will be ready when GOD says you are ready. It is never too late to start the Healing Process [the HP]. If you can't get the money for therapy or if you have bought into the silly ``prejudgments'' about therapy don't let that stop you because you can find your Way to the self- help section of the bookstore or library instead of buying new trains and going to the movies to see another comedy, or having rugged sex again GREG, you can start on that Healing Path [The HP]. This all includes me also, even after 35 years of therapy. Don't think I think I am exempt. This is how you weed the de il out of your life. And stop handing power over to him. You see, I no longer believe in the devil or sin, but that gets into another article. I can tell you this. I take the ``V'' out of the middle letter of that Mother Fucker's name and I turn it into the word VICTORY for myself and my people and your people--not for him to beat us up once again. It is that simple. Malcolm said BY ANY MEANS NECESSARY--I had to steal that ``V'' from that little Mother Fucker, you don't think he just gave it to me do you? Just like I had to steal Bruce's shirts........................................................iIhad to save Bruce's life and make the de il powerless..... You can do the same thing...

If you don't want to go to the book store and the library and go to the self-help section go to your Barber and your Pastor and talk it out, or a relative of significant other, but don't let things fester Like a raisin in the WHAT!!! Thank you Langston Hughes.... and Loraine Hans berry....fester inside like that football player did. You see the results there... Go with Abandon. Open you heart and your Spirit. Stop with the excuses, the self- medication, the alcohol and over sexualization the self-lies. I am NOT saying don't be gay or a homosexual. I'm a homosexual. BUT stop lying to yourself. Stop hiding things under the rug Ed. You live in a house that is also falling down and that has a lot of bumpy spots under the rugs where you have hidden your stories and lies and deceit. You are a church man. Do you actually think GOD doesn't know about what you have done and are doing? Do you actually think your church members don't know? When a person gets Brest cancer Cheryl they often have to have a radical mastectomy. The word Radical is what I am. People don't like that word. I am a radical person. I was put here by GOD to rip the wounds open so they can heal properly. Excuse the bumps inside my lips I have oral herpes. It will never go away or heal properly but it is somewhat treatable for the flair-ups on the inside..... Now, how will I ever find a LOVER who can deal with that? I'll have to take Him to the doctor with me and we will have to talk it out. This is therapy. I was lucky that I didn't get HIV because of the sexual activities I took part in, especially in New York City in the 1980's. Thank GOD that She [GOD] was with me in Spirit as I carried out my activities. The will kiss you on the cheek you will not get what I have, so don't go and get sick from stress you are causing yourself for not inviting me to you Birthday Party Mother Doris. I LOVe you and I think you have many more years with our church. You might NOT believe it, but this is a fine Way to bring about healing. There is a 900 pound gorilla at church at The Unity Fellowship Christ Church of Philadelphia and He is there every week. He is indifference, cattiness, pettiness, greed, hatred, self-hatred, anger, resentment, selfishness, stupidity, grief and silliness. It is OK to have political beliefs Brother Greg Jones. You can be a political Black man and not feel that you will feel persecuted. It is all throughout the Bible that you will be protected and have a long life. Please treat your lover Richard well. You see, I also love him, not in the Way you do, but He is my Brother and I love Him and YOU TOO... Yes, I was a bit jealous, but I'm had one apolitical lover before I really wasn't interested in having another one. It is time for this animal--this 600 pound gorilla--to go the way with the de il who is missing his ``V'' because the good ones among us stole that fucker's victory. You know what your problems are. You know because they DOG you each and every day. You know because you confess them to GOD sometimes, but most likely NOT even in church. They sit there among that 900 pound gorilla. In waiting, to pounce on all of us until you deal with them... Your Pastor tells you every Sunday, but you go and get some ice cream and medicate yourself with that and refuse to look at ``Michael Jackson's Man or Woman in the Mirror.....'' When you confess to your Pastor, your uncle, your aunt, your parents, your Brothers and Your sisters you will feel a new light a Bright Hope light burning inside you... You know what it is that is bothering you. You can't put your finger on it because the pain is too much. If you can't put your finger on it, try putting your finger on the feeling and talk to someone in your family or among your friends that your trust. An uncle or a Pastor. You will be giving yourself the gift of LOVE. You will be giving yourself the gift of Wellness wholeness, solitude, peace, self-worth, serenity, self-love and more stable thinking, a calmness... You will find it easier to make decisions and think through things properly because you will have an Angel on your shoulder and GOD in your pocket... the de il will melt like yesterday's nightmare... The decisions you make will be clearer, more accurate, better thought and through, more forthright, and more level headed. That means you too Carlos. I wish your LOVER could come to church with you once in a while. You have been a shining light for me and I LOVE you and I LOVE the Gay couples in our church.... Our church members will find themselves acting in reality NOT the fantasy way they saw last night on ``666 Park Avenue,'' Thanks Vanessa Williams, but don't give me more of the de il I'll just have to steal some more ``VICTORIES'' from that little fucker..you will find yourself becoming a leader, not a follower. No matter what age you are. Gandhi said something like ``Encourage the People and the Leaders will Follow,'' and as you know, King studied Gandhi. The more honest you become with yourself, Sissy, the more able you will be to see yourself as a leader. Your opinions will be sought after and you will insist on living in a cleaner environment Bruce, and you Will enjoy surrounding yourself with people who are about something positive and forward moving instead of people who will be unnecessarily critical, unconstructive in their criticism, negative and who want to hold you back and ``WE'' back as Black people. You will burn new paths in life instead of follow others like lost sheep and GET BURNED by others. Just stat by selecting one of the books from my book list about healing and helping the world to be a better place. In no time you will find yourself turning off the TV and reading book after book after book. Remember I LOVE you and I want to help. We can work through this money thing and NOT having a new church building. We have shoes. we have socks--thank you McKale--that was a gift of words that will forever give back to me--the healing process..... I want the best for my valued Brothers and Sisters. Write me at: BLockBoi75@Yahoo.Com

and I'll send you that book list over e-mail. I Will show you a whole New Way of healing, growth and financial prosperity that you never knew was just around the corner, just across the street or just around the bend in life. I want you to LOVE yourself and our people. It is a gift that keeps on giving--forever.

This article was written by, prepared by and researched by Brother Tracy Gibson, a writer, activist and businessman operating in West Philadelphia {Born and Raised} He would LOVE to hear from you. Yes, that means you.....

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